DwtS 3 -- Performance Show Week 3

The judges were the biggest story of tonight's episode of Dancing with the Stars 3, and that's never a good sign. Emmitt took a beating while Sara and Vivica received effusive praise. But none of that compared to the tongue lashings Len directed at Mario and Joey.

Emmitt Smith & Cheryl Burke - Tango
Emmitt's getting worn out after traveling between Dallas, where he lives, and Los Angeles, where the show is filmed. This week, he and Cheryl also flew to Virginia, to support Emmitt's wife as she hosted the Miss Virginia pageant. They snuck in an extra practice session, performing for the pageant crowd.

Someone, somewhere must've thought it would be funny to make Emmitt and Cheryl Tango to Robert Palmer's "Simply Irresistible." Cheryl looked fabulous tonight, sporting some sweet hair extensions, and Emmitt had no problem maintaining the intense expression expected in the Tango. It was just too bad that, by its nature, the dance didn't allow him to show his fun-loving side. He also didn't seem as comfortable with the steps as he had in his previous dances, a sign that practice time was at a premium this week.

Len said that, for the Tango, he was looking for the couples to be in a hold throughout the middle of the song. They could only be apart for a few seconds at the beginning and end. (Remember that point; it comes up again later.) Len said the couple kept their hold, but he was disappointed in Emmitt's overall performance. He also criticized Cheryl for including an illegal lift. Bruno told Emmitt, "The rock is starting to crumble. You didn't shine as you usually do." Carrie Ann said that, while there were some technical problems, the dance "wasn't all as bad as these guys [Len and Bruno] say."
Judges' Scores... Carrie Ann: 7, Len: 6, Bruno: 6 = 19/30

Monique Coleman & Louis van Amstel - Jive
Monique's mom flew from South Carolina to watch Monique perform. While seeing her mom was enough to make Monique happy, she also hoped Mom's presence in the audience might make the judges think twice before saying anything too critical.

Monique started the routine with a crazy backward leap off of the stage into Louis' arms. It almost looked like a stunt from Miami Vice -- appropriate, since they danced to "The Heat Is On," by Glenn Frey. The extra long fringe on Monique's outfit made all of her moves look quick and exaggerated, which probably helped in a fast dance like the Jive. The fringe also weighed down her skirt, pulling it down a bit at one point. But Monique maintained her sense of humor, telling Tom Bergeron after the dance that the daring leap at the beginning scared the clothes right off of her.

Apparently, Len is a big fan of the Eagles. He said he liked the song, and he told Monique the routine had "vitality and fun." Bruno, in reference to her bright yellow outfit, dubbed Monique "Little Miss Sunshine." Carrie loved the risky jump and said Monique's moves were "strong and sharp." She also warned the other contestants to take note of Monique.
Judges' Scores... Carrie Ann: 9, Len: 9, Bruno: 9 = 27/30

Harry Hamlin & Ashly DelGrosso - Tango
For inspiration, Ashly and Harry watched couples Tango at an Argentine restaurant. His modus operandi for this week? "Passion, passion, passion."

This was not one of the evening's best performances, in part because the band used some strange, high-pitched effect during the song that sounded like chatty sparrows squeegeeing windshields. The dancing itself was competent, if not memorable. Harry's expression was inscrutable, but if he says that's his passionate face, then I guess it's his passionate face. He showed the most personality after the routine, when he took a rose from his lapel, walked up to Carrie Ann, and then spun around and handed the rose to Bruno.

Bruno said, "the performance was good, but the footwork was messy at times." Carrie joked that she recinded the 10 that she planned to give Harry, because he gave his rose to Bruno. She said she appreciates his hard work, but he's "still a little awkward." Len jumped to Harry's defense: "These two should go to Lenscrafters, because they're giving two-for-one. That was great!"
Judges' Scores... Carrie Ann: 7, Len: 8, Bruno: 7 = 22/30

Willa Ford & Maksim Chmerkovskiy - Jive
Willa broke into tears after week's trip to the bottom two. Knowing that she needed a perfect routine this week, Willa told Max she'd do everything he said without arguing. Of course that didn't last long, and Max walked out of the rehearsal studio at one point, as Willa did last week. Max said that Willa's frustrations stem from the constant pressure she puts on herself to overachieve. Willa told us this competition means so much to her because, unlike some of her competitors, "I don't have Super Bowl rings. I don't have an Oscar. I don't have a Country Music Award."

Willa sported a sexy diner waitress (or space stewardess) outfit for their Jive, a dance that really seemed to suit her style. Her footwork was great, though she didn't move as quickly as the dance demanded.

Carrie called Willa "the best natural dancer," but she was critical of the lifts the couple included. Len, said, "I liked some of it, and some of it I wasn't too keen on." Bruno retorted, "Len, you're so grumpy tonight. That was pure Betty Grable. I loved the American cheesecake." Backstage, Samantha told Willa and Max, "You two are really falling for each other!" The couple was too stunned by the comment to respond.
Judges' Scores...Carrie Ann: 7, Len: 7, Bruno: 8= 22/30

Jerry Springer & Kym Johnson - Tango
Kym's plan was to have Jerry emulate James Bond during their Tango. "It doesn't appear she's been drinking," said Jerry. "But she's not playing with a full deck."

Jerry wore a Sean Connery-era Bond white tux and pantomimed holding a gun. He gave a solid performance, having worked on his technique as the judges requested. The dance was fun, and afterward, Kym ran to give him a hug as the crowd chanted, "Jerry." Tom joked that Jerry looked like James Bond, but as played by George Lazenby.

Bruno said the routine was "more like the Pink Panther -- a technical massacre." Carrie agreed that the dancing wasn't great, but said that it was Jerry's best so far. Len said, "It was a very unusual Tango, but the footwork was good and it was fun."

Waiting for his scores backstage, Jerry said he wasn't interested in winning the whole competition, but prefered instead to win "Miss Congeniality." He said that he wanted to stick around to the waltz, so he could dance with his daughter at her wedding. But after that, "America should come to its senses" and eliminate him, because "everything hurts."
Judges' Scores...Carrie Ann: 7, Len: 7, Bruno: 7 = 21/30

Sara Evans & Tony Dovolani - Jive
In order to make Sara feel more comfortable, she and Tony worked some country line dancing into their Jive. In fact, they all but replaced their Jive with a line dance, complete with cowboy boots. Sara looked at home in her cowgirl gear, as she stepped to "These Boots Are Made For Walking." But Albanian Tony made the least convincing cowboy ever.

Carrie Ann shouted, "I loved it! You might want to keep those cowboy boots on for a few more numbers." Len liked it as well. Bruno told Sara she was "glowing and radiant. Use those assets." Watch the video if you'd like to know which two assets Bruno is refering to.
Judges' Scores...Carrie Ann: 8, Len: 9, Bruno: 8 = 25/30

Mario Lopez & Karina Smirnoff - Tango
To get in the mood for a sexy Tango, Mario kissed Karina on the cheek and smelled her hair during practice.

Mario and Karina worked in some exciting drops and lifts, breaking holds to do so -- despite the judges' warnings against such tricks last week. They're a great pair of dancers, but Mario needs to believe that the audience will still appreciate him if he plays by the rules. He insisted that he's bending the rules to make things exciting for the fans, but such statements make it seem as if fans aren't sophisticated enough to appreciate ballroom dancing without stunts.

Len asked the couple point blank, "Whose idea was it to break the hold in the middle of the dance?" When they didn't answer (though Karina did hide behind Tom), Len shouted, "I would've given you a 10!" Bruno told the couple that by including illegal moves, "you make us mark you down." Carrie told them, "Respect the rules. You might go further in this competition." Still incensed, Len said, "Karina, you're the jockey, he's the horse. You need to get a tighter hold of the reins." Carrie Ann and Bruno both agreed that, like Len, they would've awarded Mario and Karina 10s if they'd followed the rules.
Judges' Scores...Carrie Ann: 8, Len: 6, Bruno: 8 = 22/30

Vivica A. Fox & Nick Kosovich - Tango
Following a cathartic performance last week, Vivica found herself sobbing. "No one can be as hard as nails all the time," Nick said of her. But Vivica recovered quickly, putting on a tutu and taking ballet lessons this week, at Carrie Ann's suggestion.

For her dance, Vivica sported a short hairdo reminiscent of Dorothy Dandridge. But Dorothy never had to Tango to a song by Shaggy. Vivica put forth a strong effort, looking tough and elegant throughout.

Bruno called her "the drama queen of the night." Carrie said, "You're a diva!" Vivica ran up to the judge's table and kissed Carrie Ann, finally having won over her harshest critic. Len gave suggestions as to what he thought Vivica's middle initial "A" stands for: "Animal, Attack, Aggression, Atmosphere. I enjoyed it."
Judges' Scores...Carrie Ann: 9, Len: 9, Bruno: 9 = 27/30

Joey Lawrence & Edyta Sliwinska - Jive
In honor of their Elvis song, Edyta helped Joey find a pair of "Blue Suede Shoes." Edyta's pseudo-poodle skirt fit right in. Their dancing was great, although Joey did a handstand and then flipped Edyta over. It was a appealing routine, but --after what had transpired earlier in the show -- one that was sure to draw the ire of the judges.

Bruno reminded "Joey the Dynamo" that lifts aren't allowed. Carrie told the couple, "Once again, you were fabulous." Len, still grumpy after Mario's performance, took special offense at Joey's handstand. "This isn't Cirque de Soliel. It isn't clever. It's terrible. Don't do it." In reponse to Len's rant, Tom cracked, "So, you didn't manage to get through the whole cigarette during the commercial break." Joey apologized for the illegal lifts and promised to do better next week.
Judges' Scores...Carrie Ann: 8, Len: 6, Bruno: 8 = 22/30

Leaderboard:
1 (tie) - Monique & Louis, Vivica & Nick
3 - Sara & Tony
4 (tie) - Willa & Max, Harry & Ashly, Mario & Karina, Joey & Edyta
8 - Jerry & Kym
9 - Emmitt & Cheryl