DwtS 3 -- Performance Show Week 6

Sara Evans saved her first public interview regarding her divorce for tonight's episode of Dancing with the Stars. It closed the show on a somber note, after a night of high-energy dancing.

The show began with a pro demonstration of all of the dances scheduled for this episode, including the Tango, which Sara & Tony would've danced. Because Louis is the only male professional dancer left in the competition, Max and Tony lent their skills to the performance. With four female pros left to match up with the three guys, Cheryl sat out the demo -- presumably because she spent most of the week training with Emmitt in Texas.

Mario Lopez & Karina Smirnoff - Mambo
Mario warned viewers, "Just because I'm Latin doesn't mean that the Latin dances come naturally to me." To get in the spirit, Karina and Mario went to a dance club with Eva Longoria. Over drinks, Eva slurred, "I want to know why a Russian is teaching you Latin dances." She and Mario went off to dance, leaving Karina sitting at the table alone. Karina was polite about being ditched, so I fumed on her behalf.

Making use of all of their assets, Mario wore a sleeveless shirt and Karina wore a low-cut dress. Mario took Carrie Ann's advice and made his moves less staccato than last week. It was a fun routine, full of spins. Overall, it was more athletic than it was emotional.

Len told Mario, "Parts of that were as good as you can dance. When you're dancing together, you don't focus on each other." Bruno was unabashedly enthusiastic: "You're a devil on that dance floor. Sinfully good." Carrie Ann said, "I noticed a difference at the beginning, you didn't clip your arms as much. You're close to our professionals, that's why I nitpick you so much."
Judges' Scores: Carrie Ann...9, Len...9, Bruno...10 = 28/30

Monique Coleman & Louis van Amstel - Samba
Monique asked Louis if she could do a solo during their performance, assuming that Louis would choreograph it for her. But he refused, instead bringing in Tommy the Clown to help her. Tommy's the man who created krumping, a form of freestyle dancing.

Monique opened the routine by running out of the audience, sporting a short, curly hairstyle and a pink outfit with things that looked like tentacles hanging from the rear. Monique did her krump solo to the opening bars of "ABC," by the Jackson 5. The solo was so different from ballroom, it just didn't make sense. This was their most exciting performance, but it didn't scream Samba -- although if Louis is just hoping to win over the audience, it could work.

Carrie Ann said, "I've got to be careful what I ask for, 'cause that energy was fantastic. I think it was a little self-indulgent to do the solo at the beginning." Len directed his comments at Louis: "The first half had no Samba. The rest of it was an absolute hodgepodge of peculiar stuff." Bruno told Monique, "Krumping is great in the right place at the right time, but this is a Samba. You should've stuck to Louis's instructions." Louis promised to tell the judges where the Samba was in the routine later.
Judges' Scores: Carrie Ann...9, Len...7, Bruno...7 = 23/30

Joey Lawrence & Edyta Sliwinska - Rumba
"I don't want to make you uncomfortable," Edyta said to Joey as they practiced. "But we have to act like lovers. Now grab my head." Because that's what lovers do. Joey and Edyta attempted to be sexy, laughing the whole time. Joey ran the routine by his wife, Chandie, to make sure she approved of it. She chided the couple for not being sexy enough.

Edyta began the routine silhouetted on the stage, looking like she was covered in nothing but a small, very strategically placed bedsheet. Joey was at the foot of the stage with a microphone, lip-synching "Father Figure" by George Michael, as one of the house band singers performed the real vocals. The whole thing had an unsettling effect. Edyta got tangled in her bedsheet dress a few times, but apart from that, they moved very well across the floor. Finally, Joey looked relaxed as he danced. And if you're going for sexy, having Edyta half-naked pretty much takes care of that.

Bruno said, "I like a little bit of dirty dancing. You could've gone a little bit dirtier for my tastes." Carrie Ann said, "I hated the beginning with the microphone. But the dancing was a lot better this week." And Len said, "I thought that was right on the money."
Judges' Scores: Carrie Ann...8, Len...8, Bruno...8 = 24/30

Emmitt Smith & Cheryl Burke - Jive
To get in the mood for the fast kicking Jive, Cheryl brought in some Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders to inspire Emmitt. He did high kicks with them, and they cheered, "Go Emmitt!" as he and Cheryl practiced.

So that Emmitt didn't become overwhelmed by the speed of the Jive, Cheryl worked the fast parts into small chunks, with plenty of slower sections in between. It didn't interrupt the flow of the dance at all. I don't know that I've seen two more genuine in-dance smiles this season than the ones Emmitt and Cheryl wore during this performance. Emmitt ended the routine by sliding across the floor on his knees, and he came up laughing.

Len told Emmitt, "You went off-time once. It's not the end of the earth! You went off-time once. Well done." Bruno said, "You two create such joy, such energy." Carrie Ann told Emmitt, "You had a lot of mistakes. But every man who watches you says, 'I want to dance like that.'"
Judges' Scores: Carrie Ann...8, Len...8, Bruno...9 = 25/30

Jerry Springer & Kym Johnson - Paso Doble
Apparently having watched some other dancing show with some other Jerry last week, Kym said, "Jerry was like a sexy tiger in the Samba." Jerry was nervous about this week's Paso Doble, pointing out, "There are no 62-year-old matadors working." The couple went to a Bloodless Bullfight, where Jerry was easily defeated in the ring by a baby bull.

Jerry came out in full matador regalia, wearing a hat and holding a guitar, which he smashed on the steps. Putting a different spin on the Paso Doble, Jerry shambed about like a matador afraid of the bull -- and Kym was the bull. (I thought the woman was supposed to be the cape, but who's afraid of a cape?) It was a strange spectacle, which culminated in Jerry falling to the ground in defeat. After the music stopped, Kym and Tom dragged Jerry off of the floor.

The judges couldn't even look at Jerry without laughing. Gathering herself, Carrie Ann said, "Entertainer you are, but it went a little too far." Len said, "Everyone here should congratulate Kym, because she does such a great job. Jerry, I don't think the world's ready for your Paso Doble." Bruno said, "It's been a perverse pleasure watching you every week, butchering every dance. Tonight it was the Texas Chainsaw Massacre."

While waiting for his scores, Samantha asked Jerry if he was ready to learn two new dances next week. "These are all such better dancers," Jerry said. "We're having fun, but it's painful"
Judges' Scores: Carrie Ann...7, Len...6, Bruno...5 = 18/30

Group Disco
On her way to practice the Disco routine, 22-year-old Cheryl said, "Emmitt is gonna be great. This is his era." Jerry arrived wearing a white suit, just like John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever. Since the group danced to "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough," by Michael Jackson, Joey and Mario fought over who had the best Michael Jackson dance moves.

Tony came back to help the couples work on their lifts. When Cheryl described their lift -- similar to the famous lift at the end of Dirty Dancing -- as "scary," Emmitt said, "It's not that scary."

"It is for me!" Cheryl replied.

Emmitt & Cheryl and Monique & Louis opened the routine with some nice lifts. Then Jerry broke out some dance moves familiar to those of us with marginal dancing skills -- classics like the sprinkler and the lasso, and something that involved him rolling on the floor. There was a bit of miscommunication between Joey and Edyta, resulting in Edyta administering a Chuck Norris-style roundhouse kick to Joey's head. Mario lifted Karina much more smoothly.

While the judges didn't score the routine, Len complimented Emmitt, Joey, and Mario on their lifts. He told Monique she had great rhythm, and said, "Jerry's impression of Free Willy was absolutely fabulous." At that precise moment, a killer whale flopped onto the floor and out-danced Jerry.

Sara Evans Interview
Tom didn't throw Sara any softballs, as he asked her if divorce proceedings were already in the works when the show started. Sara said that some things were already in motion, but that "it was always my intention to try [to work things out]. I'm completely against divorce."

Sara said that she received the report on the sexually explicit content found on her husband's computer last Tuesday, just before dress rehearsal. Her intent had been to finish the run of the show, but "something traumatic" happened on Wednesday night after the Results Show that made her fear for her children's emotional welfare -- specifically that of her seven-year-old son. Tom observed, "Somehow 'Mommy has to go disco dance' might not have been the thing that he needed to hear."

Sara said, "I just needed to be right there to look at my son at all times, to see the expression on his face, to see if he's crying. I just needed to take care of my children."

While she's worried about the effect that the proliferation of details about her divorce will have on her family, she appreciates the support she's been getting from fans and fellow entertainers. For right now, she's ready to go home "and just be a mom."

As for her DwtS experience, she said, "People were calling and voting for me and, for whatever reason, they could identify with me. It is so humbling, and I'll never forget it." She'll be back for the finale, along with partner Tony, with whom she's forged a friendship, "even though he's Albanian."

Tony was understanding about having to leave the show as a result of Sara's decision. "If I was in her position, I'd do the same thing," he said. Sara's also asked Tony to choreograph her tour next year.

Leaderboard
1 - Mario & Karina
2 - Emmitt & Cheryl
3 - Joey & Edyta
4 - Monique & Louis
5 - Jerry & Kym

I split my votes this week between Joey & Edyta and Emmitt & Cheryl. Their routines captured the spirit of their dances better than the others.

Tomorrow night, Lionel Ritchie performs, and we find out if tonight's votes actually count, since it's unlikely anyone will be eliminated.